February 22nd, 2026: Forgiving Even Those We Hate
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, one God. Amen.
As we stand on the edge of Great Lent, the Church gives us a gift. That gift is forgiveness. Not the shallow kind. Not the kind that says, “It’s fine,” while we still carry anger inside. The Church calls us to something deeper. She calls us to real forgiveness.
Forgiveness Sunday is not just a tradition. It is preparation. We cannot enter the fast while holding onto resentment. We cannot move toward the Kingdom of Heaven while dragging old wounds behind us.
Years ago, when I was in seminary, I struggled deeply with someone who made life very difficult for me. It was not a small disagreement. It was painful. It was constant. It was the kind of experience that makes you question everything.
I brought this struggle to confession. I explained the situation. I expected to hear the usual advice. “Just forgive and move on.” That is good advice. But my confessor went deeper. He asked me a question I have never forgotten.
He said, “Do you know what true forgiveness really is?”
Then he explained it this way. True forgiveness is this. When you die and stand in the Kingdom of Heaven glorifying God, and you see that person standing next to you, how do you respond? If you cannot say, “Glory to God for all things,” then forgiveness is not yet complete.
That changes everything.
We live in a world obsessed with justice. If someone does wrong, they must pay. If someone says something foolish, they must be shamed. Our culture is quick to cancel, quick to expose, quick to condemn. But the Gospel calls us to something different.
We are reminded again and again that every person is made in the image and likeness of God. Not just the kind people. Not just the easy people. Every person.
You do not know what someone else is carrying. You do not know the wounds they have suffered. You do not know the struggles they hide. Sometimes people hurt others because they themselves are hurting.
This does not excuse sin. But it changes how we respond to it.
Forgiveness is not saying that evil is good. Forgiveness is choosing not to let another person’s sin control your heart. It is choosing to pray for them instead of replaying the offense in your mind.
What Real Forgiveness Looks Like
In less than a day, we begin the fast. We give up meat and dairy. We pray more. We come to church more often. We try to quiet our distractions. We do all of this so we can focus on Christ.
So why would we add more weight to ourselves?
Resentment is heavy. Anger is heavy. Bitterness is heavy. When we carry those things, we are not free. We think about the other person. We rehearse the argument. We imagine what we would say if we saw them again.
All the while, our attention is pulled away from God.
The evil one wins when he shifts our focus from our own repentance to the sins of others. Instead of praying, we judge. Instead of asking mercy for ourselves, we demand punishment for someone else.
That is how we slowly become like the Pharisee who thanks God that he is not like other men. But we are called to be like the Publican who says, “Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.”
The Freedom of Forgiveness
Think about what happens when you truly let something go. There is a lightness that comes. There is space in your heart again. You are not chained to the past.
When we gather for Forgiveness Vespers, we ask one another for forgiveness. Sometimes we know exactly what we did. Sometimes we have no idea. That is not the point. The point is humility.
We bow. We say, “Forgive me.” The other person responds, “God forgives.” In that moment, something beautiful happens. Pride cracks. Walls come down. Grace moves.
It does not matter how large or small the offense was. What matters is that we choose not to let it define us.
Even in marriage, even in close friendships, there is always a part of the other person we do not fully understand. We must give each other the benefit of the doubt. We must pray instead of assume. We must trust that God is working in them just as He is working in us.
True forgiveness means praying that the person who hurt you enters the Kingdom of Heaven. It means wanting their salvation. It means not being upset if you see them standing beside you in glory.
That is hard. It is not natural. It is supernatural.
Lent is not about showing how strong we are. It is about becoming clean in heart. It is about removing the clutter that blocks us from God. Anger is clutter. Grudges are clutter. Old fights are clutter.
As we begin this season, let us set those things down. Let us walk into the fast lighter. Let us focus on what truly matters.
If we begin Lent with a clean heart, Pascha will be different. When we proclaim, “Christ is risen,” it will not just be words. It will be joy from a heart that has been healed.
So forgive. Even if it is hard. Even if it takes time. Start the process. Pray for the person. Ask God to bless them. Ask God to save them. Ask God to soften your own heart.
We all struggle. We all fall. We all need mercy. Let us give to others what we so desperately ask from God.
As we enter Great Lent, let us take this opportunity to let go. Let us remove the weight from our shoulders. Let us step into the fast ready to grow closer to Christ.
And may we all stand together in the Kingdom of Heaven and say with one voice, Glory to God for all things.
Amen.